JLU S1E2: Kryptonian STD

Wonder Woman and Batman arrive at Supes’ birthday party to find that he has – an STD!  DUN DUN DUNNN

Episode 2 of Justice League Unlimited is straight out of Men in Black: The Animated Series.  Let’s see: mysterious alien creature attaches to character, giving them their hearts’ desire in a dream-like setting where dream logic prevails, and they have to give it all up to wake up and overcome the alien thingy.  CHECK.  I think MiB did it better – with Agent Elle invading Jay’s dream, finding the source of the dreams (the parasite alien) and making Jay battle it / reject it to wake him up and dislodge the alien.

Instead, Supes is on his own to figure out that it’s all a dream while Wonder Woman is nearly beaten to death defending his sleepy ass.  Actually, the lengths that the cartoon goes to show how much pain she is in is pretty awesome.  At one point, she slowly crawls across the room while a limp arm clutches her side.  That’s pretty messed up, and a first for DC Animated.  Usually Superman is around to take the hard beating.

The creature itself is CLEARLY a face hugger that fused with a rosebush, like a Xenomorph got drunk and impregnated Biolante from Godzilla.  The ‘Black Mercy’ injects a pink tongue directly into your chest (ignore the sternum, I guess) and grabs on with these purple tentacles.  Where the subtext of the first Alien movie was all about men getting pregnant (confirmed by the script writer himself), this plant is all about giving you awesome dreams for no reason at all.  There are teeth on the thing but there’s no mention of it devouring its victims.

In Superman’s dreams, he is banging a redhead voiced by Lois Lane from JLU.  Her name is never mentioned, but I assume it’s Lana Lang.  BANGIN!  Overall not a bad episode with lots of action and a parallel / dream world, which is par for the course in good DC Animated TV.

7 / 10 would bang TWICE and write fan fiction about



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2 Responses to JLU S1E2: Kryptonian STD

  1. Yeah I disagree. Seeing Wonder Woman in so much is NOT awesome. I mean never. She could be almost unbeatable because she’s of Athena. She’s real powerful and intelligent and stronger I tell you. Oh yeah hopefully she does have a healing factor and she would heal instantly later on maybe at the end.

  2. I say Mongul’s demeaning sexist remarks and overconfidence and self beliefs actually leads to his downfall as seen in the end, s he really underestimates the wits from Bateman and Wonder Woman. And Wonder woman’s attempts in the fight proves him wrong as she knocks him out in a dream.

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